last day of freedom

then tomorrow it's back to the salt mines (for all who don't understand the expression, it means going back to a tedious work), oh how nice this extended weekend have been!

I forgot to put away the x-mas lights yesterday, I got caught up in Bones =) it was the episode where the stalker shoots Booth. I had a nice walk as well, it took me about an hour to walk the 5 kilometers that will be the short choice for the girl-run next Saturday. I'm still not sure which to choose. There's too much asphalt, I'm not sure my knees are up for the long run, though, to be truthful, out of the extra 5 km, I think 4 is on gravel and soil. I'll have to walk it this week and get a feel for it. I will need to do some jogging in the beginning, just to get some speed up, I'm such a terribly slow walker, even when I speed up.

Today we'll go to moms place and have dinner, and clean the car. I'll also check out the sewing magazines she found at R's place for mama-clothes. That aught to do it for the rest of the day, might go for a walk in the woods, check out "my" spot, where I wanna build a house.

Puppy talk:
So, a day in the end of March, I strolled in to Emmaus, my second-hand store of choice. Accidentally also the only one available. I scanned the racks, not looking for anything in particular, mostly seeing if there were any white polos in, but not hoping. They only sell whole, clean clothes, and white don't usually stay white very long.
I sifted through the sweater section, my eyes drawing to the rack opposite of the skirt-rack. This is where mama-pants hang. I worked my way through the sweaters, then dresses, vests and blouses. I looked around to check if anyone was observing me as I started sifting through the skirts. There were maybe three other customers in the store. I was done with the skirts and tried to look casual as I turned around, sucking my (not yet visible) tummy in as far as it might go, so that if someone saw me, they'd think I was just at the wrong rack. To my disappointment, there were mostly normal pants, only one pair of minimal mama-jeans and a pair of huge mama-capri's. I breathed out in relief. I had done it! WOOT!

Then, I came to the jeans racks... I see a pair of carpenter jeans, you know, the model with suspenders, and thought I'd try them if they were my size. I like that kind of jeans. As I found the tag I almost dropped them on the floor. Motherline... In a hustle I folded them over their hanger so that the tag wouldn't show, and then had to gather up the straps so they wouldn't give me away, all at the same time that I was looking around me like crazy. Is anyone watching me? Do they see what I carry? Will they know I'm preggers just by seeing my guilty face?

I tried to act inconspicuous as I checked out the rest of the rack, while keeping an eye on the crowd, now two people, and working my way towards the shoes. I constantly had to check that the folding hadn't been undone and would give me away. I found a pair of adorable little sandals and felt really silly walking with them hanging from my fingertips as I tried to look like: I'm not going to try on this pair of mama-pants, I'm just holding them for a friend as I headed for the changing rooms. One last look around before I entered, closing the drape, making sure that it was tight in both ends. I tried them on. They "fit", aka, I could have had a bathing ball underneath it without a trouble, and that was at the smaller setting. I fidgeted. It was 8€. They were huge. I was bound to need them later on in my pregnancy, especially since I'm determined to work all the way to October. But to buy them would be to confess to the world that I was preggers. I needed a plan.

I sat down on the chair inside the little boot and scavenged my mind for ideas. In the end, my plan was brilliant! When the clerk would comment on my findings (I shop there a lot, she knows me and she's friendly) I would say that I was shopping for a friend who didn't live in town. This wouldn't be the first time, although I had never shopped mama-clothes before but still. I felt a bit braver in my resolve and stepped outside. To freeze, the store had filled up, there was absolutely surely 5 people in there now! I was in such a hurry to see if I had all tags and stuff covered that I almost dropped everything on the floor. I tried to look normal as I approeched the check-out, while looking around me franticly all the time. I was shaking as I laid my findings on the desk, and waited for the doom...

What I hadn't noticed was that the price-tag wasn't at the size-tag as they usually were. It was attached to a pocket. And thanks to all my hysterical folding, it was now upwards to the clerk. She punched it in, along with my shoes and told me that they had 50% off on everything that day, and did I need a bag for my purchases?

I was numb as I walked out and as I stumbled home I wondered Was that it? All my anxiety for nothing? D laughed at me, Misty got a tummy-ache from laughing so hard when I told her, I'm sure you all though it to be hilarious, but to me, it was very traumatic at the time, having to guard my every move, almost hiding in the racks while waiting for people to pass so no one would see what I carried. Lucky thing they don't have a store-police, I must have looked so suspicious...